Dangerous Incorporated
07-18-2007, 03:18 AM
http://img127.imageshack.us/img127/5644/ecwck1.png (http://imageshack.us)
The new ECW opening is awesome, but I miss the old Slashtones ECW theme song.
Joey Styles and Tazz welcomed everyone to ECW and noted they were expecting a major announcement from ECW champion Johnny Nitro. They showed reporters camped outside his locker room. A "press agent" for Nitro came out and said that tonight would be the last time Nitro would appear on ECW. He said Nitro would have an official announcement during a conference in the ring later tonight. Tazz and Joey wondered what that meant and said that was "huge."
CM Punk made his way to the ring. They plugged the ECW title match for the Great American Bash. Elijah Burke made his way to the ring.
CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke
Burke started jawing at Punk. They had words center-ring. They cinched into a collar and elbow lockup, working their way around the ring. They went for a test of strength in the center of the ring, which Punk won. He leveraged Burke into the air and slammed him down. Punk kept up the momentum, taking Burke to the mat. Punk cinched in a reverse hammerlock, then ran Burke into the turnbuckles. Punk hit a couple of kicks and a legdrop for a two count. He went right back to working on the arm as Burke screamed Punk was going to break it. Burke made his way up to his feet and kicked Punk. He tossed him into the corner and took over with strikes. Burke got a two count after an elbowdrop. Burke went for a suplex, but Punk reversed it for a near fall. Punk went right back to the arm. Punk charged him in the corner but was kicked. Burke and Punk fell over the ropes to the floor as they went to commercial. So far, OK. Technically sound but just OK.
Zack Morris will star in Atomic Twister. I'm hoping for AC Slater in Nuclear Chutes & Ladders.
When ECW returned, Burke had Punk trapped in a one leg Boston Crab. He began dropping elbows over the small of Punk's back. Punk kicked up at two. He cinched in a full Boston Crab as Punk screamed in anguish. Punk tried to crawl to the ropes. He teased tapping out but finally reached them. Burke tried to pull Punk back towards the center but was kicked off. Punk began nailing Burke with round kicks. Burke cut him off with a punch, then continued the assault. Burke applied a sufboard from a kneeling position. You could hear a small "CM Punk" chant briefly.
Burke dropped Punk down into a backbreaker over the knee, but only got a two count. Burke complained about a slow count from referee Scott Armstrong. Burke continued to work over Punk's lower back. He slammed Punk. He went to grab Punk, who kicked him from a prone position. Punk began nailing kicks and finally a clothesline. He nailed a flapjack on Burke, then a kick for a two count. Burke drilled Punk with a back suplex for a near fall. Punk comes back with a DDT for a near fall.
Burke nailed a German suplex, but Punk kicked up. Burke began peppering Punk with a series of left hands. He went for a clothesline, but Punk ducked and caught him with the GTS, scoring the pin.
Your winner, CM Punk!
The match was OK. Punk vs. Richards last week was much more fun.
Punk motioned for the belt with his hands during his exit.
Tazz and Joey Styles discussed the debut of Big Daddy V and said up next was his first ECW match. Believe it or not, the former Mabel actually appeared for the original ECW at the November to Remember '98 in New Orleans, but that doesn't count in this revisionist version of ECW.
They aired a Raw Rebound segment designed to push John Cena vs. Bobby Lashley at the Great American Bash. They did a good job of building the bout with all the "legends" giving their comments. I liked it.
Matt Striker came to the ring wearing a suit and tie. He said he gave the Boogey Man a lesson in redemption and they showed V's debut last week. introduced Big Daddy V.
Big Daddy V vs. Tim Storm
V killed Storm with a running splash in the corner. He hit a Samoan Drop and a Bubbaslam, then scored the pin. The end.
Your winner, Big Daddy V!
When ECW returned from commercial, The Miz was inside the ring in street clothes. He called himself a chick magnet and said that no matter where he is, women throw themselves at him. He said that every woman in the arena wants him. He said that perhaps it's his personality, or his charisma, or even his good looks, but the fact is "Chicks dig me and men fear me." He said that he's about to call out three women who have special surprise for him. How is it a surprise if he knows about it? Extreme Expose come to the ring. Layla El called for a chair and sat his Mizness down in in. Two of them danced while Kelly Kelly sucked. Seriously, Robby the Robot has more rhythm. They tamely lapdanced Miz.
Tazz and Joey Styles wondered what Johnny Nitro's announcement about tonight being his final ECW appearance meant and whether it was related to the Extreme Rules match from last week with Tommy Dreamer. They showed a series of clips from the match.
Tommy Dreamer made his way to the ring.
Tommy Dreamer vs. Kevin Thorn
AGAIN?? Who's wrestled more, these two or CM Punk and Stevie Richards? Sheesh!
Thorn goes for a punch but Dreamer nails him first. I guess these two, uh, know each other. Thorn runs Dreamer backwards into the ring. Dreamer hiptosses him. Dreamer dropped an elbow over thorn. Thorn went outside to the apron, then dropped down, snapping Dreamer's arm over the ropes. The announcers said Dreamer's shoulder was hurting from last week. Thorn went right after the shoulder, pulling at it, then kicked Dreamer off. He applied a top wristlock, then shoulderblocked Dreamer down. Dreamer finally hit a neckbreaker. Dreamer kicked Thorn as he charged in the corner, then snapped him backwards with another neckbreaker. Dreamer went to the top rope, slowly, and was caught. Thorn went for the Dark Kiss/Original Sin, but Dreamer shoved him off. Thorn beat him down and went for a suplerplex. Dreamer shoved him off and hit a splash off the ropes,...seriously. Dreamer only got a two count. Dreamer went for a piledriver, but his arm hurt and Thorn snapped him to the mat. Thorn went for a powerbomb but Dreamer escaped and hit a clothesline. He went for a DDT, but Thorn evaded and threw Dreamer shoulder-first into the ringpost. Thorn pulled Dreamer back into the ring and covered him clean for the win.
Your winner, Kevin Thorn!
Thorn went after Dreamer, set him up and drilled him with Original Sin. Thorn stalked around the ring. Match was eh. We've been here and done this dance two dozen times.
Backstage, Johnny Nitro's press agent came out of the locker room. The announcers said the press conference was coming next.
When we returned to the ring, Johnny Nitro's press agent, who announced Nitro had officially changed his name. The former Nitro came out with a new hairstyle, new theme music and a rock star like suit. He looked like The Doors' Jim Morrison or Billy Crudup in Cameron Crowe's Almost Famous, minus the goatee. He said that he came out tonight to make a statement and that his name is not Johnny Nitro.
His new name is....John Morrison. He said that he's been given that name at birth and since then he's been destined to do great things. He could walk at four months and could run at eight. He skipped first grade and went right to third grade. He was elected to High School Presidency and wasn't even running. He said he was a true champion. He said he was the new face of ECW and destroyed Tommy Dreamer last week and would do the same to CM Punk at the Great American Bash.
He said that speaking of names, what does CM Punk mean. He asked what CM stands for and suggested it means, Chasing Men or Common Man or Cookie Monster. Morrison's delivery is really good. He said that a Punk is a disrespectful little man with lame tattoos that didn't know his place.
CM Punk's music hit and he came to the ring. Morrison said that he hoped Punk wasn't here to confront him because this was a press conference not a wrestling match. He said he wasn't going to lay a finger on Punk until he beats him senseless at the Bash. He then asked Punk how he came up with his clever little ring name. Before Punk could answer, Morrison hit him with a ring, then struck him with the microphone, breaking it. Morrison nailed Punk with a corkscrew neckbreaker, then arrogantly put his sunglasses on and posed over the prone Punk, then walked out.
Morrison headed to the locker room, turning to look back at Punk. Punk, holding his neck, began to get up as they went off the air.
The last segment was the best thing on the show by far. Nitro's makeover was handled absolutely perfect.
Source: PWInsider
John Morrison with a look like Jim Morrison?? Oh dear god what is happening to WWE!
The new ECW opening is awesome, but I miss the old Slashtones ECW theme song.
Joey Styles and Tazz welcomed everyone to ECW and noted they were expecting a major announcement from ECW champion Johnny Nitro. They showed reporters camped outside his locker room. A "press agent" for Nitro came out and said that tonight would be the last time Nitro would appear on ECW. He said Nitro would have an official announcement during a conference in the ring later tonight. Tazz and Joey wondered what that meant and said that was "huge."
CM Punk made his way to the ring. They plugged the ECW title match for the Great American Bash. Elijah Burke made his way to the ring.
CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke
Burke started jawing at Punk. They had words center-ring. They cinched into a collar and elbow lockup, working their way around the ring. They went for a test of strength in the center of the ring, which Punk won. He leveraged Burke into the air and slammed him down. Punk kept up the momentum, taking Burke to the mat. Punk cinched in a reverse hammerlock, then ran Burke into the turnbuckles. Punk hit a couple of kicks and a legdrop for a two count. He went right back to working on the arm as Burke screamed Punk was going to break it. Burke made his way up to his feet and kicked Punk. He tossed him into the corner and took over with strikes. Burke got a two count after an elbowdrop. Burke went for a suplex, but Punk reversed it for a near fall. Punk went right back to the arm. Punk charged him in the corner but was kicked. Burke and Punk fell over the ropes to the floor as they went to commercial. So far, OK. Technically sound but just OK.
Zack Morris will star in Atomic Twister. I'm hoping for AC Slater in Nuclear Chutes & Ladders.
When ECW returned, Burke had Punk trapped in a one leg Boston Crab. He began dropping elbows over the small of Punk's back. Punk kicked up at two. He cinched in a full Boston Crab as Punk screamed in anguish. Punk tried to crawl to the ropes. He teased tapping out but finally reached them. Burke tried to pull Punk back towards the center but was kicked off. Punk began nailing Burke with round kicks. Burke cut him off with a punch, then continued the assault. Burke applied a sufboard from a kneeling position. You could hear a small "CM Punk" chant briefly.
Burke dropped Punk down into a backbreaker over the knee, but only got a two count. Burke complained about a slow count from referee Scott Armstrong. Burke continued to work over Punk's lower back. He slammed Punk. He went to grab Punk, who kicked him from a prone position. Punk began nailing kicks and finally a clothesline. He nailed a flapjack on Burke, then a kick for a two count. Burke drilled Punk with a back suplex for a near fall. Punk comes back with a DDT for a near fall.
Burke nailed a German suplex, but Punk kicked up. Burke began peppering Punk with a series of left hands. He went for a clothesline, but Punk ducked and caught him with the GTS, scoring the pin.
Your winner, CM Punk!
The match was OK. Punk vs. Richards last week was much more fun.
Punk motioned for the belt with his hands during his exit.
Tazz and Joey Styles discussed the debut of Big Daddy V and said up next was his first ECW match. Believe it or not, the former Mabel actually appeared for the original ECW at the November to Remember '98 in New Orleans, but that doesn't count in this revisionist version of ECW.
They aired a Raw Rebound segment designed to push John Cena vs. Bobby Lashley at the Great American Bash. They did a good job of building the bout with all the "legends" giving their comments. I liked it.
Matt Striker came to the ring wearing a suit and tie. He said he gave the Boogey Man a lesson in redemption and they showed V's debut last week. introduced Big Daddy V.
Big Daddy V vs. Tim Storm
V killed Storm with a running splash in the corner. He hit a Samoan Drop and a Bubbaslam, then scored the pin. The end.
Your winner, Big Daddy V!
When ECW returned from commercial, The Miz was inside the ring in street clothes. He called himself a chick magnet and said that no matter where he is, women throw themselves at him. He said that every woman in the arena wants him. He said that perhaps it's his personality, or his charisma, or even his good looks, but the fact is "Chicks dig me and men fear me." He said that he's about to call out three women who have special surprise for him. How is it a surprise if he knows about it? Extreme Expose come to the ring. Layla El called for a chair and sat his Mizness down in in. Two of them danced while Kelly Kelly sucked. Seriously, Robby the Robot has more rhythm. They tamely lapdanced Miz.
Tazz and Joey Styles wondered what Johnny Nitro's announcement about tonight being his final ECW appearance meant and whether it was related to the Extreme Rules match from last week with Tommy Dreamer. They showed a series of clips from the match.
Tommy Dreamer made his way to the ring.
Tommy Dreamer vs. Kevin Thorn
AGAIN?? Who's wrestled more, these two or CM Punk and Stevie Richards? Sheesh!
Thorn goes for a punch but Dreamer nails him first. I guess these two, uh, know each other. Thorn runs Dreamer backwards into the ring. Dreamer hiptosses him. Dreamer dropped an elbow over thorn. Thorn went outside to the apron, then dropped down, snapping Dreamer's arm over the ropes. The announcers said Dreamer's shoulder was hurting from last week. Thorn went right after the shoulder, pulling at it, then kicked Dreamer off. He applied a top wristlock, then shoulderblocked Dreamer down. Dreamer finally hit a neckbreaker. Dreamer kicked Thorn as he charged in the corner, then snapped him backwards with another neckbreaker. Dreamer went to the top rope, slowly, and was caught. Thorn went for the Dark Kiss/Original Sin, but Dreamer shoved him off. Thorn beat him down and went for a suplerplex. Dreamer shoved him off and hit a splash off the ropes,...seriously. Dreamer only got a two count. Dreamer went for a piledriver, but his arm hurt and Thorn snapped him to the mat. Thorn went for a powerbomb but Dreamer escaped and hit a clothesline. He went for a DDT, but Thorn evaded and threw Dreamer shoulder-first into the ringpost. Thorn pulled Dreamer back into the ring and covered him clean for the win.
Your winner, Kevin Thorn!
Thorn went after Dreamer, set him up and drilled him with Original Sin. Thorn stalked around the ring. Match was eh. We've been here and done this dance two dozen times.
Backstage, Johnny Nitro's press agent came out of the locker room. The announcers said the press conference was coming next.
When we returned to the ring, Johnny Nitro's press agent, who announced Nitro had officially changed his name. The former Nitro came out with a new hairstyle, new theme music and a rock star like suit. He looked like The Doors' Jim Morrison or Billy Crudup in Cameron Crowe's Almost Famous, minus the goatee. He said that he came out tonight to make a statement and that his name is not Johnny Nitro.
His new name is....John Morrison. He said that he's been given that name at birth and since then he's been destined to do great things. He could walk at four months and could run at eight. He skipped first grade and went right to third grade. He was elected to High School Presidency and wasn't even running. He said he was a true champion. He said he was the new face of ECW and destroyed Tommy Dreamer last week and would do the same to CM Punk at the Great American Bash.
He said that speaking of names, what does CM Punk mean. He asked what CM stands for and suggested it means, Chasing Men or Common Man or Cookie Monster. Morrison's delivery is really good. He said that a Punk is a disrespectful little man with lame tattoos that didn't know his place.
CM Punk's music hit and he came to the ring. Morrison said that he hoped Punk wasn't here to confront him because this was a press conference not a wrestling match. He said he wasn't going to lay a finger on Punk until he beats him senseless at the Bash. He then asked Punk how he came up with his clever little ring name. Before Punk could answer, Morrison hit him with a ring, then struck him with the microphone, breaking it. Morrison nailed Punk with a corkscrew neckbreaker, then arrogantly put his sunglasses on and posed over the prone Punk, then walked out.
Morrison headed to the locker room, turning to look back at Punk. Punk, holding his neck, began to get up as they went off the air.
The last segment was the best thing on the show by far. Nitro's makeover was handled absolutely perfect.
Source: PWInsider
John Morrison with a look like Jim Morrison?? Oh dear god what is happening to WWE!