flamesoffury
08-14-2007, 10:14 PM
WWE Raw Live Report
August 13 in New York City, N.Y.
The show started with a video package recapping Vince McMahon's verbal tirade on Congress, the media, and the I.R.S., before Coach informed him he has an illegitimate child running around.
Ross and Lawler introduced the show from ringside, and they talked about Lawler having to crown King Booker tonight. They plugged Cena & Umaga vs. Randy Orton & Carlito tonight.
Ringside, there were various wrestlers assembled from Raw, ECW, and Smackdown. Vince McMahon then walked out and said he's had one or two romps, but he doesn't even remember the lady who he had the illegitimate child with. He said the woman wouldn't even tell him who the child is. McMahon said he won't be intimidated by Congress, the media, or a woman who should have been on the pill. The fans chanted, "Who's your daddy?" at McMahon, then he said he's glad to have the support of the wrestlers, his family, and the fans. The fans booed in kind. McMahon screamed that he's supported the fans all these years, so the least they could do is support him in his time of need while he's been in the public spotlight for 30 years when nothing has ever bothered him. Suddenly, Stephanie McMahon's music hit and Stephanie walked out on stage and into the ring.
She brought up Vince's accusations against her last week, then Vince screamed back at Stephanie that she's all about the money. Stephanie said Vince is the one who faked his own death and was served with a paternity suit from a woman who he doesn't even know. Stephanie said she spoke with the plaintiff's attorney office earlier today and found out the person is standing around the ring right now. Vince turned his head toward the ceiling and stared in disbelief. Stephanie said Vince's bastard is a WWE superstar. Vince surveyed the crew surrounding ringside while some fans chanted, "Kennedy, Kennedy." Vince kept looking around the ring, then he left the ring steps and stared down Mr. Kennedy. They shared a moment while the fans popped. Vince then stared down Mark Henry, who said, "Not a chance." Vince started to leave again, but not before looking at Kennedy once again.
[Q2]
[Commercial Break]
They showed a video package on Bobby Lashley's arthroscopic shoulder surgery. He cut a promo on Mr. Kennedy for the storyline injury on Raw two weeks. Lashley said he blames himself for the injury, but he's going to make sure Kennedy pays for it. Dr. James Andrews said Lashley should recover from the injury and be back at full strength. These surgery videos are getting old. Ross, echoing that sentiment, said they might want to call Dr. Andrews by a new name of St. Andrews because of the work he's done lately.
Mr. Kennedy then came to the ring and cut a promo about taking out Lashley. Before he could announce his name, Sandman's music hit and Sandman came through the crowd to the stands.
1 -- MR. KENNEDY vs. THE SANDMAN
Crowd was hot in the early going for Sandman's wild flurry of "offense" on Kennedy. Sandman went for a Russian Legsweep and connected before climbing up top, only to be crotched and tossed to the mat. Kennedy then hit a charging knee strike to Sandman's head in the corner. He followed with a rolling gut buster out of the fireman's carry position for the win. After the match, Kennedy finished his ring introduction.
WINNER: Mr. Kennedy in 2:00. Short match to give Kennedy a win to start his big push. (1/2*)
Backstage, Vince McMahon spoke with The Coach about how bad it is for his daughter to tell him about the illegitimate child. Coach tried to calm Vince down, then Coach suggested they run through all the ages of the WWE talent roster to find out who the child is. Vince said he first became sexually active before he was even a teenager. Vince looked down at his crotch, then Coach looked down as well. Coach said it really could be anyone on the roster. Ric Flair then stepped in behind Vince and Whoo'ed. Vince looked toward the ceiling as Flair smiled. Yep, that's apparently all Flair is capable of doing despite cutting a great promo on Smackdown this week.
They showed a video package on Randy Orton's path of destruction. Ross plugged the Cena & Umaga vs. Orton & Carlito match tonight.
[Commercial Break]
[Q3]
They're doing WWE Idol tonight with William Regal hosting. They cut backstage where Simon Regal Cowell addressed some people off stage. JBL and Michael Cole then started singing in ridiculous outfits. Cole botched his line, then JBL tore into him. Regal said they're done. Maria and Ron Simmons then walked into the shot and Regal told So Cal Maria Val that she's one of the hosts for Idol. Santino then interrupted and said he would sing a song so great that he would melt the heart of his-a Maria. Santino left to chase after Regal, then Maria chased down Santino. Simmons walked over to JBL and Cole and looked them over. JBL said the '80s are back, then he asked Simmons who his favorite '80s band is. Simmons thought it over and said, "Wham!"
Cryme Tyme came out to a good pop, being from Brooklyn. They went over to Lillian Garcia and stole her chair before auctioning it off. They approached Lil' Bow Wow and said he had too much money. A Konnan-look-alike took out his wallet, but they skipped him. A guy in the front row pulled out some serious cash and Cryme Tyme took the money before handing over the autographed chair. Cade & Murdoch interrupted the proceedings for a match.
They aired a video plug for SNME this Saturday night.
[Commercial Break]
2 -- WWE tag champions CADE & MURDOCH vs. CRYME TYME (J.T.G. & SHAD GASPAR) -- non-title match
Joined in progress with Cade and Murdoch working on Shad in their corner. Shad eventually fought off Murdoch and made the hot tag to JTG, who cleaned house. JTG came off the top rope with a hang-time leg drop for a nearfall. The action broke down, then Cade and Murdoch hit high-low on JTG. They had the pin, but Shad used the auctioned chair to smash Murdoch in the back to earn a DQ.
WINNERS: Cade & Murdoch via DQ in 3:00. Standard tag team fare, where WWE doesn't give them enough time to develop a complete story in the ring. (3/4*)
[Q4]
They aired another video package on Randy Orton, this time focusing on how he killed Rob Van Dam. Ross and Lawler plugged Cena & Umaga vs. Orton & Carlito again.
[Commercial Break]
They aired a video package on Triple H. There's blood in the halls of the corridor. Whatever that means.
Ross and Lawler talked about Lawler having to put the crown on King Booker tonight. Lawler said he would rather pass a kidney stone than put the crown on Booker. Um...sure.
3 -- SNITSKY vs. ROBBIE (w/Rory)
Snitsky kicked Robbie in the gut and ran him over with a clothesline. He landed the pumphandle slam for the win. Snitsky wasn't done after the match, so he kicked Rory in the face and gave him a pumphandle slam. Lawler said Snitsky could be McMahon's son.
WINNER: Snitsky in 0:20. Squash. Move along. (n/a)
They cut backstage where Vince was talking to Coach about all of the places he's had sex at national landmarks. Coach then asked Vince to give him a list of all of his indiscretions so he could cross-reference the list with people on the roster and have an answer by Saturday. Cody Rhodes then walked into the shot and assured Vince that he knows who his father is. He then handed Vince a present that he was going to use later, and left. Vince opened his hand and found a condom. He then told Coach to call his attorney so he could sue Trojan. Suddenly, Boogeyman's music hit and he popped out behind a traveling case. He sang a lull-a-bye about Vince being his dad, then laughed hysterically to himself. Coach told Vince that he has his eyes. Vince stared into Boogeyman's eyes before running off. They stayed forever on Boogeyman laughing after smashing the clock over his head.
[Commercial Break]
[Q5]
Tomorrow night on ECW, C.M. Punk maintains his momentum. Or does he? How much momentum? 5 percent? 20 percent?
Todd Grisham welcomed us to tonight's soccer hour. Er...Grisham introduced WWE Idol. He then announced William Regal as one of the celebrity judges. Grisham introduced Maria as the second guest. Maria said Grisham's pitch was great, but his melody was off. Grisham was confused, as was Maria. Grisham then brought out Mick Foley as the third guest. Anything to get on TV and finagle a check. Foley said he realized two things on the way to the ring. One is how great it is to be in New York City. The second is that he will do anything for money. True dat. In a shocking development, the first contestant was Jillian Hall. She came out on stage wearing so much eye make-up that her eyes were invisible. Jillian went for some Broadway show tunes, but they didn't quite hit. Foley said for the first time in his life, he's glad he had his ear ripped off. Maria tried to find a complement. Regal said tonight's main event should be Roe vs. Wade because that was an abortion. He told her to scram. Our next guests where Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff, accompanied by The Fink. Fink announced that everyone rise for the singing of the Soviet National Anthem. Volkoff started to sing, like it was the 1980's in the Garden all over again. Foley said that was classic, and he was impressed when the fans chanting, "U-S-A" didn't affect him. Maria said she couldn't understand anything. Sheik took the mic and ripped on Regal. Who knows what he said, but I think he said something about selling out MSG. Security then intervened and escorted them away.
Lillian Garcia came out last and started to sing "New York, New York," but Santino interrupted. Santino said Lillian's outfit looks like Times Square is missing a dirty prostitute. Santino then busted out a song. Someone ate at Olive Garden over the weekend. Maria was smitten. Foley cut him off and said listening to that was almost as painful as watching him wrestle. Santino sarcastically said that was funny, but he's leaving with Maria. Maria said she's still judging, so she can't leave. Ron Simmons walked out and Santino made fun of him for rhyming like Sesame Street. Simmons didn't take too kindly, so he chucked Santino into the side of the Titantron. Regal announced Simmons as the winner, then Simmons paused for dramatic effect and shouted, "Damn!" Entertaining, but has there been any wrestling on the show? Two squashes and half off a throwaway tag match.
[Commercial Break]
[Q6]
They aired a video package on Randy Orton taking out Dusty Rhodes.
4 -- CODY RHODES vs. CHARLIE HAAS (w/Shelton Benjamin)
They went into an exchange of standing holds in the opening minute, with Cody scoring a nearfall on a roll up. Haas then kicked Cody hard in the gut and went on the attack with kicks to the back. Cody made a brief comeback, but Haas caught him with a belly-to-belly suplex for a nearfall. Cody made his comeback at 4:00 with successive dropkicks and a bulldog before coming off the top with a cross body block that Haas rolled through into a nearfall. Suddenly, Cody scored an inside cradle pin on Haas for the win.
WINNER: Cody in 4:00. Just a singles match. They haven't given any focus to Haas and Shelton the past few weeks, so they're presented as afterthoughts to the fans. Why invest emotions in a match featuring a wrestler who WWE hasn't invested time in? Cody is OK in the ring, but it's time to move the storyline along that he's trying to impress Dusty. (3/4*)
Ringside, Lawler reluctantly stared at the crown sitting across from him and his music hit. He got up from his seat to do what he has to do.
[Commercial Break]
King Booker was saluting the crowd out of the break, with Sharmell standing in awe of her king. Lawler stood opposite the coronation table with his hands on his hips. The fans booed Booker and Sharmell, which Booker soaked up with grace. Booker cut a promo asking Lawler to put the crown on his head now. Lawler took his time, so Booker snapped out of his royal bit and screamed at Lawler to put the damn crown on his dome.
[Q7]
Lawler said he's not going to put the crown on his head because he was handed a note from Regal that Booker is having a match at Summerslam. Suddenly, Triple H's music hit and a video package aired to a strong pop. The fans booed when the music stopped and Hunter was nowhere to be found. Lawler then placed the crown on the mat and stomped on it. Sharmell distracted Lawler, allowing Booker to get his licks in. Booker rolled Lawler to the outside, then smashed him across the forehead with a TV monitor. Ross screamed at Booker for taking his liberties on Lawler. The fans chanted, "a-----" at Booker, who told Ross he would break him off too. That was a great transition from Booker. The fans were pissed that Hunter's music came on and Hunter didn't come out, so Booker took the heat against Hunter and put it on himself for destroying Lawler and screaming at Ross.
[Commercial Break]
They came back and recapped Booker smashing Lawler in the previous segment. Ross said Lawler is being tended to by medics. Todd Grisham joined Ross at ringside for commentary, and they broke down the Summerslam card.
They aired a video package on Randy Orton taking out Sgt. Slaughter. Orton then came to the ring for the main event tag match. He took the mic and said John Cena is the longest-reigning WWE champion in almost two decades. Mix of boos and cheers. Orton said that in less than two weeks, the storybook ride will be over. He said he doesn't just beat people; he ends careers. Orton polled the crowd on who dislikes Cena and the fans cheered. He said he's going to be their hero whether they like it or not. Cheers, then boos. He polled the crowd on who favors Cena. Mix again. He said he's going to be their worst nightmare because nothing will stop him from becoming the new WWE champion. More boos than cheers. The anti-Cena fans want Cena to lose, but Orton isn't exactly high on the list of potential suitors.
[Commercial Break]
[Q8]
They aired a video package hyping SNME this Saturday at 11:30 p.m. EST on NBC. Carlito then came out as Orton's partner. Umaga came out to an indifferent reaction, as if fans weren't buying the pseudo-babyface turn. Cena's music hit to a loud mix of boos and cheers. He came to the ring with a big smile on his face and held up the WWE Title belt for Orton to get a good look at.
5 -- RANDY ORTON & CARLITO vs. WWE champion JOHN CENA & IC champion UMAGA
The bell sounded and the "Cena sucks" vs. "Let's go Cena" chants started. Umaga and Orton started things off, with Umaga running over Orton with hard blows. The action quickly broke down and the babyface team cleared Orton and Carlito from the ring. Cena and Umaga had a staredown before they cut to a break.
[Commercial Break]
Cena worked on Carlito out of the break, with the dueling chants still filling the arena. Cena ran over Carlito with a shoulder block, then he hit the sit-out slam before setting up for the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cena went for the FU, but Orton grabbed Carlito from the apron to pull him down. Orton then yanked Cena to the outside and the heels double-teamed Cena before rolling him back into the ring. The heels took turns working on Cena as the fans kept up with the match with a continuous streak of chants.
[Q9 -- over-run]
At the top of the third hour, Orton went into full stomp mode, working on Cena's upper body and face. He became greedy and went for a high knee drop, but Cena moved. Carlito tagged in and traded blows with Cena, who telegraphed a back drop and took a kick to the upper chest for a nearfall. At 10:00, the heels went back on the attack in their corner. I believe the fans went with a "Ran-d-y Orton...sucks" chant, with the females and kids filling in the "sucks" on the pause. Cena fought out of a chinlock, then Orton went for a corner splash, but Cena moved and nailed a bulldog. Carlito tagged in and cut off Cena from making a tag before Cena back dropped Carlito high into the air. Cena finally reached his corner and dove at Umaga, who didn't quite understand the concept of accepting a tag. After some confusion, Umaga entered the ring and cleaned house. He gave Orton the charging rear splash in the corner to a big pop. Carlito then bumped Umaga from behind, looking for the back stabber, but Umaga barely felt it. He then turned around and stared down Carlito, who backed up into an FU from Cena. Cena made the cover for the win. Afterward, Cena reluctantly celebrated with Umaga.
WINNERS: Cena & Umaga in 15:00. Great crowd heat carried the otherwise very soft in-ring action. That's why it's so valuable to have a Cena on the roster because his sheer presence creates an environment where the wrestlers can basically take a night off because the crowd heat will be there no matter what. If only WWE spent more time investing in the characters on the mid-card to help build up that connection with the audience. (**1/4)
Instead of closing with the segment to potentially sell a PPV in 13 days, they cut backstage where Vince celebrated with Coach that the night is finally over. Coach wanted to make sure he had all of Vince's indiscretions. Vince said it was only his moments from the 70's. He then talked about a trip to China where he found two flight attendants and took them to the rest room where everyone on the plane could hear them going at it. Coach told Vince to slow down, then the camera panned to the left to show Linda McMahon standing with her hands on her hips. Vince tried to explain himself, but Linda told him that he no longer has a home.
Mick foley was a nice surprise.. vince staring at kennedy is a dead giveaway.. i have to download this raw because it sounds awesome.
August 13 in New York City, N.Y.
The show started with a video package recapping Vince McMahon's verbal tirade on Congress, the media, and the I.R.S., before Coach informed him he has an illegitimate child running around.
Ross and Lawler introduced the show from ringside, and they talked about Lawler having to crown King Booker tonight. They plugged Cena & Umaga vs. Randy Orton & Carlito tonight.
Ringside, there were various wrestlers assembled from Raw, ECW, and Smackdown. Vince McMahon then walked out and said he's had one or two romps, but he doesn't even remember the lady who he had the illegitimate child with. He said the woman wouldn't even tell him who the child is. McMahon said he won't be intimidated by Congress, the media, or a woman who should have been on the pill. The fans chanted, "Who's your daddy?" at McMahon, then he said he's glad to have the support of the wrestlers, his family, and the fans. The fans booed in kind. McMahon screamed that he's supported the fans all these years, so the least they could do is support him in his time of need while he's been in the public spotlight for 30 years when nothing has ever bothered him. Suddenly, Stephanie McMahon's music hit and Stephanie walked out on stage and into the ring.
She brought up Vince's accusations against her last week, then Vince screamed back at Stephanie that she's all about the money. Stephanie said Vince is the one who faked his own death and was served with a paternity suit from a woman who he doesn't even know. Stephanie said she spoke with the plaintiff's attorney office earlier today and found out the person is standing around the ring right now. Vince turned his head toward the ceiling and stared in disbelief. Stephanie said Vince's bastard is a WWE superstar. Vince surveyed the crew surrounding ringside while some fans chanted, "Kennedy, Kennedy." Vince kept looking around the ring, then he left the ring steps and stared down Mr. Kennedy. They shared a moment while the fans popped. Vince then stared down Mark Henry, who said, "Not a chance." Vince started to leave again, but not before looking at Kennedy once again.
[Q2]
[Commercial Break]
They showed a video package on Bobby Lashley's arthroscopic shoulder surgery. He cut a promo on Mr. Kennedy for the storyline injury on Raw two weeks. Lashley said he blames himself for the injury, but he's going to make sure Kennedy pays for it. Dr. James Andrews said Lashley should recover from the injury and be back at full strength. These surgery videos are getting old. Ross, echoing that sentiment, said they might want to call Dr. Andrews by a new name of St. Andrews because of the work he's done lately.
Mr. Kennedy then came to the ring and cut a promo about taking out Lashley. Before he could announce his name, Sandman's music hit and Sandman came through the crowd to the stands.
1 -- MR. KENNEDY vs. THE SANDMAN
Crowd was hot in the early going for Sandman's wild flurry of "offense" on Kennedy. Sandman went for a Russian Legsweep and connected before climbing up top, only to be crotched and tossed to the mat. Kennedy then hit a charging knee strike to Sandman's head in the corner. He followed with a rolling gut buster out of the fireman's carry position for the win. After the match, Kennedy finished his ring introduction.
WINNER: Mr. Kennedy in 2:00. Short match to give Kennedy a win to start his big push. (1/2*)
Backstage, Vince McMahon spoke with The Coach about how bad it is for his daughter to tell him about the illegitimate child. Coach tried to calm Vince down, then Coach suggested they run through all the ages of the WWE talent roster to find out who the child is. Vince said he first became sexually active before he was even a teenager. Vince looked down at his crotch, then Coach looked down as well. Coach said it really could be anyone on the roster. Ric Flair then stepped in behind Vince and Whoo'ed. Vince looked toward the ceiling as Flair smiled. Yep, that's apparently all Flair is capable of doing despite cutting a great promo on Smackdown this week.
They showed a video package on Randy Orton's path of destruction. Ross plugged the Cena & Umaga vs. Orton & Carlito match tonight.
[Commercial Break]
[Q3]
They're doing WWE Idol tonight with William Regal hosting. They cut backstage where Simon Regal Cowell addressed some people off stage. JBL and Michael Cole then started singing in ridiculous outfits. Cole botched his line, then JBL tore into him. Regal said they're done. Maria and Ron Simmons then walked into the shot and Regal told So Cal Maria Val that she's one of the hosts for Idol. Santino then interrupted and said he would sing a song so great that he would melt the heart of his-a Maria. Santino left to chase after Regal, then Maria chased down Santino. Simmons walked over to JBL and Cole and looked them over. JBL said the '80s are back, then he asked Simmons who his favorite '80s band is. Simmons thought it over and said, "Wham!"
Cryme Tyme came out to a good pop, being from Brooklyn. They went over to Lillian Garcia and stole her chair before auctioning it off. They approached Lil' Bow Wow and said he had too much money. A Konnan-look-alike took out his wallet, but they skipped him. A guy in the front row pulled out some serious cash and Cryme Tyme took the money before handing over the autographed chair. Cade & Murdoch interrupted the proceedings for a match.
They aired a video plug for SNME this Saturday night.
[Commercial Break]
2 -- WWE tag champions CADE & MURDOCH vs. CRYME TYME (J.T.G. & SHAD GASPAR) -- non-title match
Joined in progress with Cade and Murdoch working on Shad in their corner. Shad eventually fought off Murdoch and made the hot tag to JTG, who cleaned house. JTG came off the top rope with a hang-time leg drop for a nearfall. The action broke down, then Cade and Murdoch hit high-low on JTG. They had the pin, but Shad used the auctioned chair to smash Murdoch in the back to earn a DQ.
WINNERS: Cade & Murdoch via DQ in 3:00. Standard tag team fare, where WWE doesn't give them enough time to develop a complete story in the ring. (3/4*)
[Q4]
They aired another video package on Randy Orton, this time focusing on how he killed Rob Van Dam. Ross and Lawler plugged Cena & Umaga vs. Orton & Carlito again.
[Commercial Break]
They aired a video package on Triple H. There's blood in the halls of the corridor. Whatever that means.
Ross and Lawler talked about Lawler having to put the crown on King Booker tonight. Lawler said he would rather pass a kidney stone than put the crown on Booker. Um...sure.
3 -- SNITSKY vs. ROBBIE (w/Rory)
Snitsky kicked Robbie in the gut and ran him over with a clothesline. He landed the pumphandle slam for the win. Snitsky wasn't done after the match, so he kicked Rory in the face and gave him a pumphandle slam. Lawler said Snitsky could be McMahon's son.
WINNER: Snitsky in 0:20. Squash. Move along. (n/a)
They cut backstage where Vince was talking to Coach about all of the places he's had sex at national landmarks. Coach then asked Vince to give him a list of all of his indiscretions so he could cross-reference the list with people on the roster and have an answer by Saturday. Cody Rhodes then walked into the shot and assured Vince that he knows who his father is. He then handed Vince a present that he was going to use later, and left. Vince opened his hand and found a condom. He then told Coach to call his attorney so he could sue Trojan. Suddenly, Boogeyman's music hit and he popped out behind a traveling case. He sang a lull-a-bye about Vince being his dad, then laughed hysterically to himself. Coach told Vince that he has his eyes. Vince stared into Boogeyman's eyes before running off. They stayed forever on Boogeyman laughing after smashing the clock over his head.
[Commercial Break]
[Q5]
Tomorrow night on ECW, C.M. Punk maintains his momentum. Or does he? How much momentum? 5 percent? 20 percent?
Todd Grisham welcomed us to tonight's soccer hour. Er...Grisham introduced WWE Idol. He then announced William Regal as one of the celebrity judges. Grisham introduced Maria as the second guest. Maria said Grisham's pitch was great, but his melody was off. Grisham was confused, as was Maria. Grisham then brought out Mick Foley as the third guest. Anything to get on TV and finagle a check. Foley said he realized two things on the way to the ring. One is how great it is to be in New York City. The second is that he will do anything for money. True dat. In a shocking development, the first contestant was Jillian Hall. She came out on stage wearing so much eye make-up that her eyes were invisible. Jillian went for some Broadway show tunes, but they didn't quite hit. Foley said for the first time in his life, he's glad he had his ear ripped off. Maria tried to find a complement. Regal said tonight's main event should be Roe vs. Wade because that was an abortion. He told her to scram. Our next guests where Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff, accompanied by The Fink. Fink announced that everyone rise for the singing of the Soviet National Anthem. Volkoff started to sing, like it was the 1980's in the Garden all over again. Foley said that was classic, and he was impressed when the fans chanting, "U-S-A" didn't affect him. Maria said she couldn't understand anything. Sheik took the mic and ripped on Regal. Who knows what he said, but I think he said something about selling out MSG. Security then intervened and escorted them away.
Lillian Garcia came out last and started to sing "New York, New York," but Santino interrupted. Santino said Lillian's outfit looks like Times Square is missing a dirty prostitute. Santino then busted out a song. Someone ate at Olive Garden over the weekend. Maria was smitten. Foley cut him off and said listening to that was almost as painful as watching him wrestle. Santino sarcastically said that was funny, but he's leaving with Maria. Maria said she's still judging, so she can't leave. Ron Simmons walked out and Santino made fun of him for rhyming like Sesame Street. Simmons didn't take too kindly, so he chucked Santino into the side of the Titantron. Regal announced Simmons as the winner, then Simmons paused for dramatic effect and shouted, "Damn!" Entertaining, but has there been any wrestling on the show? Two squashes and half off a throwaway tag match.
[Commercial Break]
[Q6]
They aired a video package on Randy Orton taking out Dusty Rhodes.
4 -- CODY RHODES vs. CHARLIE HAAS (w/Shelton Benjamin)
They went into an exchange of standing holds in the opening minute, with Cody scoring a nearfall on a roll up. Haas then kicked Cody hard in the gut and went on the attack with kicks to the back. Cody made a brief comeback, but Haas caught him with a belly-to-belly suplex for a nearfall. Cody made his comeback at 4:00 with successive dropkicks and a bulldog before coming off the top with a cross body block that Haas rolled through into a nearfall. Suddenly, Cody scored an inside cradle pin on Haas for the win.
WINNER: Cody in 4:00. Just a singles match. They haven't given any focus to Haas and Shelton the past few weeks, so they're presented as afterthoughts to the fans. Why invest emotions in a match featuring a wrestler who WWE hasn't invested time in? Cody is OK in the ring, but it's time to move the storyline along that he's trying to impress Dusty. (3/4*)
Ringside, Lawler reluctantly stared at the crown sitting across from him and his music hit. He got up from his seat to do what he has to do.
[Commercial Break]
King Booker was saluting the crowd out of the break, with Sharmell standing in awe of her king. Lawler stood opposite the coronation table with his hands on his hips. The fans booed Booker and Sharmell, which Booker soaked up with grace. Booker cut a promo asking Lawler to put the crown on his head now. Lawler took his time, so Booker snapped out of his royal bit and screamed at Lawler to put the damn crown on his dome.
[Q7]
Lawler said he's not going to put the crown on his head because he was handed a note from Regal that Booker is having a match at Summerslam. Suddenly, Triple H's music hit and a video package aired to a strong pop. The fans booed when the music stopped and Hunter was nowhere to be found. Lawler then placed the crown on the mat and stomped on it. Sharmell distracted Lawler, allowing Booker to get his licks in. Booker rolled Lawler to the outside, then smashed him across the forehead with a TV monitor. Ross screamed at Booker for taking his liberties on Lawler. The fans chanted, "a-----" at Booker, who told Ross he would break him off too. That was a great transition from Booker. The fans were pissed that Hunter's music came on and Hunter didn't come out, so Booker took the heat against Hunter and put it on himself for destroying Lawler and screaming at Ross.
[Commercial Break]
They came back and recapped Booker smashing Lawler in the previous segment. Ross said Lawler is being tended to by medics. Todd Grisham joined Ross at ringside for commentary, and they broke down the Summerslam card.
They aired a video package on Randy Orton taking out Sgt. Slaughter. Orton then came to the ring for the main event tag match. He took the mic and said John Cena is the longest-reigning WWE champion in almost two decades. Mix of boos and cheers. Orton said that in less than two weeks, the storybook ride will be over. He said he doesn't just beat people; he ends careers. Orton polled the crowd on who dislikes Cena and the fans cheered. He said he's going to be their hero whether they like it or not. Cheers, then boos. He polled the crowd on who favors Cena. Mix again. He said he's going to be their worst nightmare because nothing will stop him from becoming the new WWE champion. More boos than cheers. The anti-Cena fans want Cena to lose, but Orton isn't exactly high on the list of potential suitors.
[Commercial Break]
[Q8]
They aired a video package hyping SNME this Saturday at 11:30 p.m. EST on NBC. Carlito then came out as Orton's partner. Umaga came out to an indifferent reaction, as if fans weren't buying the pseudo-babyface turn. Cena's music hit to a loud mix of boos and cheers. He came to the ring with a big smile on his face and held up the WWE Title belt for Orton to get a good look at.
5 -- RANDY ORTON & CARLITO vs. WWE champion JOHN CENA & IC champion UMAGA
The bell sounded and the "Cena sucks" vs. "Let's go Cena" chants started. Umaga and Orton started things off, with Umaga running over Orton with hard blows. The action quickly broke down and the babyface team cleared Orton and Carlito from the ring. Cena and Umaga had a staredown before they cut to a break.
[Commercial Break]
Cena worked on Carlito out of the break, with the dueling chants still filling the arena. Cena ran over Carlito with a shoulder block, then he hit the sit-out slam before setting up for the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cena went for the FU, but Orton grabbed Carlito from the apron to pull him down. Orton then yanked Cena to the outside and the heels double-teamed Cena before rolling him back into the ring. The heels took turns working on Cena as the fans kept up with the match with a continuous streak of chants.
[Q9 -- over-run]
At the top of the third hour, Orton went into full stomp mode, working on Cena's upper body and face. He became greedy and went for a high knee drop, but Cena moved. Carlito tagged in and traded blows with Cena, who telegraphed a back drop and took a kick to the upper chest for a nearfall. At 10:00, the heels went back on the attack in their corner. I believe the fans went with a "Ran-d-y Orton...sucks" chant, with the females and kids filling in the "sucks" on the pause. Cena fought out of a chinlock, then Orton went for a corner splash, but Cena moved and nailed a bulldog. Carlito tagged in and cut off Cena from making a tag before Cena back dropped Carlito high into the air. Cena finally reached his corner and dove at Umaga, who didn't quite understand the concept of accepting a tag. After some confusion, Umaga entered the ring and cleaned house. He gave Orton the charging rear splash in the corner to a big pop. Carlito then bumped Umaga from behind, looking for the back stabber, but Umaga barely felt it. He then turned around and stared down Carlito, who backed up into an FU from Cena. Cena made the cover for the win. Afterward, Cena reluctantly celebrated with Umaga.
WINNERS: Cena & Umaga in 15:00. Great crowd heat carried the otherwise very soft in-ring action. That's why it's so valuable to have a Cena on the roster because his sheer presence creates an environment where the wrestlers can basically take a night off because the crowd heat will be there no matter what. If only WWE spent more time investing in the characters on the mid-card to help build up that connection with the audience. (**1/4)
Instead of closing with the segment to potentially sell a PPV in 13 days, they cut backstage where Vince celebrated with Coach that the night is finally over. Coach wanted to make sure he had all of Vince's indiscretions. Vince said it was only his moments from the 70's. He then talked about a trip to China where he found two flight attendants and took them to the rest room where everyone on the plane could hear them going at it. Coach told Vince to slow down, then the camera panned to the left to show Linda McMahon standing with her hands on her hips. Vince tried to explain himself, but Linda told him that he no longer has a home.
Mick foley was a nice surprise.. vince staring at kennedy is a dead giveaway.. i have to download this raw because it sounds awesome.