Black Widow
08-12-2008, 06:41 PM
Here's the results from tonight's Smackdown/ECW house show at the Broome County Arena in Binghamton, N.Y.
Teddy Long appeared and ran down the card before handing it over to Justin Roberts, who introduced the first competitors:
Evan Bourne d. Kenny Dykstra via shooting star press - OK opener. I didn't know Kenny Dykstra was still in the WWE. More on that later.
Maria appeared in the crowd. Just seeing Maria, even from a distance, was worth the price of admission. She brought a family of four from the nosebleed seats to the front row after the Dad answered a trivia question. (Where was Wrestlemania 24 held?)
Divas Championship match: Michelle McCool (c) d. Victoria via what looked like a 'facebuster suplex' (does that exist?)
More Maria. She picked some kid from the front row to be the special bell-ringer for the next match.
United States Championship match: Jeff Hardy d. Shelton Benjamin (c) via DQ when MVP interfered. Jeff favored his right leg heavily from the moment he came out of the tunnel, so much so that he couldn't do that jump thing onto the turnbuckle at the start without cringing and giving up on it. Gotta love the Benjamin running powerslam. What ever happened to Lashley, anyway?
Some unfamiliar theme music introduced the next competitor -- R. Truth! His music, for those wondering, features someone shouting 'What's up? What's up?' What's up?'
R. Truth d. THE Brian Kendrick (w/Ezekiel) with a rollup. Lots of people treated this as a bathroom break. What were they thinking? Killings is kinda awesome. Did they not know who was involved in the next match? That's right ...
Finlay (w/little Horny) d. Mike Knox. I think Hornswoggle got the biggest pop of the night. Knox is a big dude. There was a Knox sign in the front row. Finish saw Hornswoggle get a low-blow on the big man, followed by a shellielagh (if you can spell that you're a better man than me) shot that the referee definitely saw. After the match, Finlay brought in six little kids to dance with Hornswoggle. Oh yeah, and an obese man. Plant?
Intermission. (Seemed unusually short ...)
World Tag Team Championship match: Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder (c) d. Jesse & Festus. This was the text-message match. 68% picked 'Lumberjack Match' over 2/3 Falls and Texas Tornado Match. Maybe it's because six-year-olds -- probably 60% of the audience -- didn't know what a Texas Tornado match is. A shame. Biscuits and Gravy!!!~ I hope Ryan Mulligan knows how much I appreciate his Festus infatuation. Side note, I was disappointed to not see Kozlov. The lumberjacks were everybody from before the intermission except Jeff Hardy. THE Brian Kendrick spent the whole match leaning on the stairs with Ezekiel, drinking a bottle of water. H&R won with a hi-lo on Festus.
More Maria.
ECW Championship match: Mark Henry (c) w/Tony Atlas d. Matt Hardy w/random six-year-old. Matt hit the Twist of Fate but was yanked from the ring by Atlas. World's Strongest Slam followed shortly thereafter. Binghamton loves Matt Hardy.
Justin Roberts announces main event is next. Promises SD will be back in Binghamton "very, very soon." I wouldn't go that far. No Umanga, as had been advertised. And no MVP match. Oh well. Three Maria appearances ... we'll call it even.
Edge's entrance was awesome. He did the requisite ripping of a kid's sign, responded to several UT signs with a throat-slash, and spent a good 30 seconds pretending to puke looking at a pair of women in the front row. Classic. Edge reminded us that he doesn't suck. Show disagreed, said he was rated 'G' for 'Giant,' called Edge 'Mrs. Guerrero' and we were on.
Binghamton, New York street fight: The Big Show d. Edge after a chokeslam through a garbage can. A little kid behind me tried to start a 'We Want Tables' chant. Valiant effort. This was maybe the worst match of the night. Seriously, the scene where Matt Damon gets his ass kicked in Binghamton in 'Rounders' was a better fight than this. Hawkins and Ryder came out and threw Edge back in the ring when Edge tried to leave. They then tried to celebrate with Show, and got double-chokeslammed. What a lame main event.
Thanks,
Chris Strub
Teddy Long appeared and ran down the card before handing it over to Justin Roberts, who introduced the first competitors:
Evan Bourne d. Kenny Dykstra via shooting star press - OK opener. I didn't know Kenny Dykstra was still in the WWE. More on that later.
Maria appeared in the crowd. Just seeing Maria, even from a distance, was worth the price of admission. She brought a family of four from the nosebleed seats to the front row after the Dad answered a trivia question. (Where was Wrestlemania 24 held?)
Divas Championship match: Michelle McCool (c) d. Victoria via what looked like a 'facebuster suplex' (does that exist?)
More Maria. She picked some kid from the front row to be the special bell-ringer for the next match.
United States Championship match: Jeff Hardy d. Shelton Benjamin (c) via DQ when MVP interfered. Jeff favored his right leg heavily from the moment he came out of the tunnel, so much so that he couldn't do that jump thing onto the turnbuckle at the start without cringing and giving up on it. Gotta love the Benjamin running powerslam. What ever happened to Lashley, anyway?
Some unfamiliar theme music introduced the next competitor -- R. Truth! His music, for those wondering, features someone shouting 'What's up? What's up?' What's up?'
R. Truth d. THE Brian Kendrick (w/Ezekiel) with a rollup. Lots of people treated this as a bathroom break. What were they thinking? Killings is kinda awesome. Did they not know who was involved in the next match? That's right ...
Finlay (w/little Horny) d. Mike Knox. I think Hornswoggle got the biggest pop of the night. Knox is a big dude. There was a Knox sign in the front row. Finish saw Hornswoggle get a low-blow on the big man, followed by a shellielagh (if you can spell that you're a better man than me) shot that the referee definitely saw. After the match, Finlay brought in six little kids to dance with Hornswoggle. Oh yeah, and an obese man. Plant?
Intermission. (Seemed unusually short ...)
World Tag Team Championship match: Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder (c) d. Jesse & Festus. This was the text-message match. 68% picked 'Lumberjack Match' over 2/3 Falls and Texas Tornado Match. Maybe it's because six-year-olds -- probably 60% of the audience -- didn't know what a Texas Tornado match is. A shame. Biscuits and Gravy!!!~ I hope Ryan Mulligan knows how much I appreciate his Festus infatuation. Side note, I was disappointed to not see Kozlov. The lumberjacks were everybody from before the intermission except Jeff Hardy. THE Brian Kendrick spent the whole match leaning on the stairs with Ezekiel, drinking a bottle of water. H&R won with a hi-lo on Festus.
More Maria.
ECW Championship match: Mark Henry (c) w/Tony Atlas d. Matt Hardy w/random six-year-old. Matt hit the Twist of Fate but was yanked from the ring by Atlas. World's Strongest Slam followed shortly thereafter. Binghamton loves Matt Hardy.
Justin Roberts announces main event is next. Promises SD will be back in Binghamton "very, very soon." I wouldn't go that far. No Umanga, as had been advertised. And no MVP match. Oh well. Three Maria appearances ... we'll call it even.
Edge's entrance was awesome. He did the requisite ripping of a kid's sign, responded to several UT signs with a throat-slash, and spent a good 30 seconds pretending to puke looking at a pair of women in the front row. Classic. Edge reminded us that he doesn't suck. Show disagreed, said he was rated 'G' for 'Giant,' called Edge 'Mrs. Guerrero' and we were on.
Binghamton, New York street fight: The Big Show d. Edge after a chokeslam through a garbage can. A little kid behind me tried to start a 'We Want Tables' chant. Valiant effort. This was maybe the worst match of the night. Seriously, the scene where Matt Damon gets his ass kicked in Binghamton in 'Rounders' was a better fight than this. Hawkins and Ryder came out and threw Edge back in the ring when Edge tried to leave. They then tried to celebrate with Show, and got double-chokeslammed. What a lame main event.
Thanks,
Chris Strub